Birthday

SH401 Wrinkled

FRONT: Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.

INSIDE: I’ll take a glass of wine and a double shot of botox- How about you? Happy
Birthday

Birthday

SH402 Zipper

FRONT: First you forget names then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your
zipper up and finally you forget to pull it down.

INSIDE: Life is just one damn thing after another! Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH403 Martini Diet

FRONT: I’m on a three martini diet Three Martinis and then I can’t find my plate.

INSIDE: Finally, a diet we can follow. Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH404 Lemons

FRONT: When life gives you lemons...

INSIDE: ...Squeeze them in someone’s eye and haul ass! Here’s to another year-don’t look back. Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH407 Good Laugh

FRONT: A smile starts on the lips, a grin spreads to the eyes, a chuckle comes from the belly. But a good laugh bursts forth from the soul, overflows and bubbles all around.

INSIDE: Wishing you a day filled with only good laughs! Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH408 Cholesterol

FRONT: It’s a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from
another person’s plate.

INSIDE: Here’s to a birthday that’s good for your heart.
Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH409 Goddesses

FRONT: Some call it a birthday party, but I call it a gathering of the goddesses.

INSIDE: Happy Birthday from one goddess to another.

Birthday

SH410 Graffiti

FRONT: Gray hair is God’s graffiti.

INSIDE: Don’t you wish he would work on another canvas? Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH412 Forehead

FRONT: You know you’re getting old when you can pinch-an-inch on your forehead.

INSIDE: Ah, the joys of aging. Happy Birthday!

Birthday

SH413 Bra-less

FRONT: Old is when going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

INSIDE: This gives wrinkle-free a whole new meaning! Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH415 Pink

FRONT: I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls.
I believe that tomorrow is another day and... I believe in miracles.

INSIDE: I believe in you! Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH417 Crazy

FRONT: Do you ever think if people heard our conversations, they’d lock
us up?

INSIDE: Have a crazy birthday!

Birthday

SH418 Makeup

FRONT: Makeup can only make you look pretty on the outside, but it doesn’t help if
you’re ugly on the inside. Unless you eat the makeup.

INSIDE: Happy Birthday to a friend who is pretty inside and out.

Birthday

SH419 Pat Benetar

FRONT: I’ve enjoyed every age I’ve been and each has had its own individual merit. Every laugh line, every scar, is a badge I wear to show I’ve been present, the inner rings of my personal tree trunk that I display proudly for all to see. Nowadays, I don’t want a perfect face and body. I want to wear the life I’ve lived.

INSIDE: Can I get a “Hell Yeah?!” Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH420 Wrinkles don’t Hurt

FRONT: There’s always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example, I’m sitting here thinking how nice it is that
wrinkles don’t hurt.

INSIDE: And I’m thankful for you! Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH423 No Men

FRONT: Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy fat women.

INSIDE: It’s your birthday, dream big!

Birthday

SH424 Pure Joy

FRONT: I want to be an outrageous old woman who never gets called old lady. I want to be leaner and meaner, sharp edged and
earth colored until I fade away from pure joy.

INSIDE: May joy surround you on your birthday

Birthday

SH425 Boobs

FRONT: I reckon’ if my boobs get any lower, I’ll have to buy them their own pair of shoes.

INSIDE: These boobs are made for walkin’!
Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH426 Cranky

FRONT: I’m old enough and cranky enough now that if someone tried to tell me what to do, I’d tell them where to put it.

INSIDE: Keep calm and have a cocktail! Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH427 Polls

FRONT: I haven’t trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I’ve never met a woman in my life that would give up lunch for sex.

INSIDE: There’s nothing sexier than a good plate of food! Happy Birthday!

Birthday

SH428 Eat Cake

FRONT: Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.

INSIDE: Nature knows best-bring on the cake!

Birthday

SH429 Lying about Age

FRONT: Eventually you’ll reach a point where you’ll stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

INSIDE: Good news because “29 and holding” wasn’t actually holding.
Happy Birthday!

Birthday

SH430 Cooties

FRONT: Life was so much easier when our clothes didn’t have to match and boys had cooties.

INSIDE: Not a care in the world-that’s the kind of day I wish for you. Happy Birthday!

Birthday

SH431 Margarita

FRONT: It’s 4:58 on Friday afternoon. Do you know where your margarita is?

INSIDE: If you need any help finding it, let me know! Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH432 Old Age

FRONT: Embrace old age. Our eyes may grow weaker, but our hearts see clearer,
finally recognizing that true friends, true love and being true to ourselves is what really matters most. You can’t learn that from a book, you must simply live with your heart wide open and embrace this amazing gift
called aging.

INSIDE: Live love and laugh through the journey. Happy Birthday

Birthday

SH438 Crown

FRONT: Always wear your
invisible crown

INSIDE: Let your inner bling
shine! Happy Birthday!

Birthday

SH440 Low cut blouse

FRONT: The solution to a bad
hair day is to wear a low cut
blouse

INSIDE: Hats are just too
obvious... Happy Birthday!

Birthday

SH441 Glitter

FRONT: Some girls are just
born with glitter in their veins

INSIDE: Get your sparkle on!
Happy Birthday!

Birthday

SH443 Book Club

FRONT: My book club only
reads wine labels.

INSIDE: Cheers! Happy
Birthday!

Baby

SH442 Snuggle

FRONT: The moment they are placed into your arms, they snuggle right into your heart

INSIDE: Congratulations on
your new little snuggle bunny

Encouragement

SH406 Hand in Hand

FRONT: Remember we all stumble-every one of us. That’s why it’s a comfort to go
hand-in-hand.

INSIDE: All a person really needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand. I am here for you.

Encouragement

SH416 Pink

FRONT: I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe
in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going
wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and... I believe in miracles.

INSIDE: I believe in you!

100% of the proceeds from this card are donated to Susan G. Komen for the Cure.

Get Well

SH422 Doctor Bill

FRONT: I wonder why you can always read a doctor’s bill and you can never read his prescription?

INSIDE: Sneaky bastards-get well soon!

Love

SH405 Hickey

FRONT: Strong women leave big hickeys.

INSIDE: Love sucks in a good way!

Love

SH421 I am

FRONT: I am because we are.

INSIDE: I (heart) you truly madly deeply.

Love

SH439 Big Boobs

FRONT: I love you with all my
boobs. I would say heart but
my boobs are bigger.

INSIDE: My cups overflow with love for you

Sympathy

SH414 Tears

FRONT: Don’t be ashamed to weep; ‘tis right to grieve. Tears are only water-and flowers, trees and fruit cannot grow without water. But there
must be sunlight also. A wounded heart will heal in time, and when it does, the memory and love of our lost ones is sealed inside to
comfort us.

INSIDE: May your heart and soul find peace and comfort.

Thank You

SH411 Bottom of my Heart

FRONT: I would thank you from the bottom of my heart, but for you my heart has no bottom.

INSIDE: Now you’ve done it... how can I ever thank you enough?